I was far from home, alone on Christmas Eve. It was my first year at the university, and I was the latest hire at my job; I had to work through the holidays. It was new for me to be separated from my family. I lived in a city foreign to me.
I felt out of place.
I was sad and felt sorry for myself when I got off work the night before Christmas. There was no tree, no presents, and no family to greet me. I shut my car door and slowly shuffled across the dormitory parking lot, struck by the emptiness.
I looked to the night sky, intending to pray one more prayer to God that this seemed so wrong.
The heavens, however, told me a different story. There seemed to be life and joy in the order and the beauty I observed. I stopped where I stood. The stars winkled with wonder as if they knew something.
What was happening; was there a message for me?
Standing with my head back and my eyes up, I wondered how the startled shepherds felt when they saw the unexpected angels. I thought about the wise men crossing a desert navigating by the light of the Christmas star. I thought about Joseph and Mary, separated from family and friends.
I thought about Jesus.
What was it like for Him to be far from His Father? Talk about being displaced! What could feel more foreign than leaving heaven for earth? He traded the splendor and strength of His position for a weak, defenseless infant’s body. I trembled at the thought.
He did that for me.
Sure, I was far from home studying for the ministry, but my discomfort was nothing compared to the mission Jesus undertook. And Christmas Eve was just the beginning, Jesus lived to die.
What kind of inner strength did He have that I didn’t?
Gratitude flooded my soul.
By now, I was walking, crossing the street on my way to the dorm. I was too self-conscious to drop to my knees, but perhaps I should have. My heart burst with thanksgiving. My body came alive with praise. It seemed I was in a musical and I should break into song.
I didn’t make this moment. I was the recipient. Jesus came to meet me where I was that night and grant me the gift of His presence.
Everything changed in less than a minute, and yet nothing changed.
I still feel the wonder. There is a connection with Jesus and Christmas Eve, which I share to this day. If I pause, I can be right back in the transcendence.
My Savior spent His first Christmas away from home for me, for all. The sacrifices I face are significant, but they are shared. There is One who understands and He is here.
Christmas Eve feels forever different.
Here’s my encouragement for you, my friend, when it is hard for you at Christmas–look up.
Gary Kendall
December 22, 2020